A wedding is like a gift of life which brings happiness and joy, it is an occasion when you have the chance of seeing the dear ones settle on a new road, a path that you’ve already got to see. As a father, you’ll be proud to see your son’s accomplishments as well as his future plans. When all is going well and the news of his engagement comes, the next step will be the wedding.
In many countries it is a habit that the people who have shared glimpses of life with the groom express the desire to address a few words, not to mention the part when you are being asked by your own son to say something. As a parent, you’ll always have some deep emotions related to your son’s life, as well as something to say about him.
But not always the feelings that dwell inside are easy to be expressed, when this comes and you have no experience at all, not to mention the fact that this might be the first time when you’re going to speak in front of an audience. However, you can notice that with a few easy steps you’ll find the balance that you need to fulfil this task. Click Here to See 25 Speech Examples
Take it easy
Nobody is more interested in what you have to say than your son and his bride, and of course the rest of the guests that have traveled to be at this event. Your words will matter and it will definitely make the difference. The best way to do this is to find some quiet moments, just you and your thoughts, to gather up some part of life that you find most relevant for this event. The whole planning can bring some fuss around your life and you’ll need to be detached in order to be able to write.
The best plan is to start early with your writing and that way you’ll have time to make adjustments, find a theme and practice the father of the groom speech. Writing doesn’t have to be an awful and impossible thing to do. The only thing that will stop you from finding ideas and be creative is yourself. Why? It is very simple – your attitude towards your work that you even haven’t started yet will make the difference. If you start positively then good results won’t delay to show, but if your attitude is very pessimistic then you’ll have plenty of reasons not to write anything and it all seems very hard to complete, thus your result will be weaker and so will your speech.DOWNLOAD MORE Speech Samples
The quality of your speech stands in the attitude that you form around the task and the force that draws you to do this. Think like this: your son is getting married and you’ve been asked to say something at his wedding. Yes, this thought can be scary but acting like it won’t turn the things to be right. He plays an important part in yours now, and you’ll be able to show your support and appreciation.
The best enemy of feelings is not the fact that they could lead you, but it is the fact that you could lead them. Be the owner of your feelings and never the other way around. For example, if you fear not to say the wrong things, this will be exactly what you’ll be doing if you haven’t put time aside to prepare for this. But if you were to pay attention, you’ll notice that you can win already by facing this thought and acting vice versa. You’ll see how a calm and relaxed attitude towards everything will make you to become an excellent speaker.
The key of speaking
When you are in front of a crowd that has gathered for your son’s wedding, the best way to perform a speech is formed by a few things.
1. Be sincere
Honesty is the best solution when performing with a wedding speech. True words are spoken from a sincere heart that doesn’t offend but rather admires and encourages. People are more opened to acts and events, to memories they can relate with. The story of your life with your son can be a true life lesson and an example to follow.
Even if you are not the type of father that is too serious and likes to joke all the time, some simple but honest words will be enough for your message to be understood. But if you are a serious man then some detachment won’t change you, but some words will show the truth about your opinion.
If you are proud of your son and what he has accomplished and succeeded to do with his life, now it will be a great opportunity to do so.
2. Don’t be something that you’re not
Many people have formed the wrong idea that a wedding speech should be made and acted in a certain way. I’m not saying that a speech shouldn’t have an introduction, a middle part or an ending, but this is about your writing and your performance.
A speech should reveal a part of you, a part of your personality and your character that was poured in your writing. The act should define you and not a copy that you took from other sources. It is a foolish thing to get inspiration from other parts if you don’t have it, but adapt everything and make it original by your standards and according to what you’ve chosen to speak about.
For example, if you like to joke a lot then you should choose some jokes that will entertain everybody and won’t put your son and his bride in an embarrassing situation. You can as well ask for some advices since not all the jokes that you consider to be fun will work in this case. People are different and so are their tastes.
3. Be natural and relaxed
What will get you through the ceremony lines of speeches is your way of being. For example, if you’ll be nervous and you’ll panic about your performance then the risk for everything to turn into a complete disaster will grow. The audience will notice if you came prepared or not. The best solution is to confront your fears and act like you are in control of them, even if at first this doesn’t seem to be like that. But as you go through a natural state, it will make you be able to look the public in the eye and say those words that you’ve written.
You won’t lose the rows of your thoughts, and in every unexpected situation you’ll be able to fix it because you stood calm and relaxed when it was your time to perform. You’ll always induce a state of mood when you are talking in front of an audience. You’ll find it easier than ever if you can think while you are acting, and all this can happen because you did your job of practicing what you’ve written.
4. Gestures and body language
As mentioned before, your attitude will make the difference. This statement is applied as well when you are in front of people who are willing to hear you. The first seconds of your speech will make the difference from a simple speaker, an amateur and someone who has it in his blood. If you are opened and you’ll welcome everyone, people will be opened as well.
The connection that you establish with them is very important for your message to be transmitted and make its way in their hearts and minds. Your body language can betray you. As people, we express a lot through our bodies, and every state is expressed, as well as every emotion. Don’t be stiff when you are talking and don’t act like you are rather at your working place than at your son’s wedding.
Avoid having a connection with your notes more than with the audience, and don’t gesticulate too much. Try to keep your hands near your body and if possible, not as much in the air. Even if you are a person who has to express himself through gestures, reduce them.
Avoid opening the buttons of your coat too much and avoid starting to rub your hands as a sign of being nervous. If you have to do something with your hands put them behind your back and then squeeze them. This will help you overcome the overwhelming of feelings that installed during the act and before your performance.
Another fact that is related to gestures and body language is the fact that our eyes express as much as our bodies are. Keeping your glance fixed on someone will add a number of questions that will put you in a weird situation. Your glance should involve the newlyweds, as well as the guests. Involving some people but excluding others will make them feel unwanted and unvalued. The best way when performing is to look at the whole audience and change position from time to time – if you find this suitable – and invite them to look at the newlyweds.
The time of your father of the groom speech
A very common mistake in the line of speeches is to share so many things that you’ll start to enjoy yourself but make others lose their patience and calm. A suitable time for speech is not to encompass more than five minutes.
There are weddings where the couple already made their plan with the whole wedding event and for every speaker they’ve built a time frame to follow. As the father of the groom, you can ask them if they have a plan like that and when will be your turn to speak.
As a general rule, your turn in line at this speech ceremony is after the father of the bride. You can add him in your speech, and I’m pretty sure that he will find some words for you as well. An exception will be made if the mother of the bride is next and then you’ll get the chance to speak.
The sketch of your speech
The best father of the groom speech is a fun and yet simple speech without any of the elaborated words or words that after two minutes of writing can’t even be remembered. A short speech will be a lot more appreciated than a long one, since people came to a wedding to enjoy themselves and share the union of the couple that decided to join destinies.
Your speech should focus on the main and important things, not on the part of where you put a bunch of details that will push you far away from the whole theme event. The essence of your speech should consist in some thanking notes addressed to the parents of the bride, since your speech is right next after theirs. As parents, both families have invested in this wedding, things like time, money, energy, feelings and many others that add up to this list. Some words of appreciation will be more than welcomed.
You can add some thanks for their words towards the groom if they did mention about him, as well as for the opening line, since they are the ones who open the wedding toasts and speeches.
Next in line will be to mention some thanking lines to all the guests who made time to come to your son and the chosen of his heart, the bride. Many people left their homes, their things or situations and made time to be here on this big day. Some notes of appreciations will make them feel involved and welcomed.
The middle part is always comprised of some stories and funny moments. These stories might describe some moments of the groom’s childhood, maybe some of his achievements. This is the time when you decide what to put in your speech. You can choose to speak about his childhood, to describe some traits that define him or other things that really have touched you as a father.
These memories should not contain embarrassing moments to put your son into a bad light, or to embarrass their relation. The past relations of your son are not a subject to remember, the past is not in the present situations anymore. Now in his life there is only a woman, the one he is getting married with. The old women are all gone, as far as his love life is concerned.
You can keep it in a funny note to bring some balance to the speech, but whatever you say, make sure not to cross the limit. After you’ll finish with your son you can complement the bride, women like to hear these kinds of things and they will suit her best since she is the one who has conquered your son’s heart.
Your closing should be built on some great wishes that will leave a mark of joy and happiness. If you don’t find your words because you are too tensed or too nervous, then wish them a great marriage, or use some words of encouragement from your marriage that helped you a lot. The wisdom that you put in these last phrases of your speech will be remembered not only by the groom and his bride, but for the guests as well, if there are good lessons to learn and follow.
The father of the groom speech should be a speech of simple but powerful words that brings gratitude and acknowledgement that your son is at the end of a life chapter, and at the beginning of a new one. Your support and your advices will make the difference and at the end you’ll be respected as a man, as a family person and as a father by all. A great speaker transmits emotions and life in his speech, and his words gain meaning and power.