Every man has different moments in life, some of them allowing him to feel proud and others allowing him to feel awful. However, a son’s marriage is always the part when you feel proud about your son’s actions. Even if you confess that none of these are true, you should find out that every father will be proud of his son, especially as soon as he gets married. While you were the groom once, it is now the time for you to accept that years passed and your role became the role of the groom’s father.
The best thing to do is always to make sure that you are prepared. Being prepared is not always something very simple, but it is always easily achievable by anyone. In this article, we are focused on being prepared with the father of the groom wedding speech structure. There are many ways to go about a wedding speech structure, still many of them will result in guaranteed failure. The key thing is to respect basic ideas and structural elements, but be flexible enough to rest assured about a certain level of flexibility, which will easily allow you to add or remove some parts, without losing quality.
Introductions will set the mood
Every great father of the groom speech will begin with the introductory part, and this is mandatory. If you fail your introduction, then it gets so much harder to make a great speech. This happens because after a lame introduction, people will naturally expect a lame speech. Of course, you are the one to decide whether this famous “rule” applies for your speech or not.
The introduction of any wedding speech – including the groom’s father wedding speech – is never meant to be long. You should generally consider only a couple of sentences, just long enough to allow people to feel welcome and happy about coming. It is also a useful idea to thank for the people who made quite some efforts to be there for you. For those people, it’s awesome to say that you welcome everyone who travelled in difficult conditions or on longer distances. This way, they won’t be able to say that they’ve made an extra effort, which was left unnoticed.Click Here for More Examples
Sometimes, it is for the jokes to help you achieve your real goals. If you want to use some nice jokes, you can go ahead and do that. However, by adventuring yourself into such things you need to know that people with different personalities will react a whole lot differently in certain circumstances. There are funny people, who really appreciate any good joke. On the other camp, there are people who would feel offended or embarrassed if they heard any joke, which they didn’t sympathize with. After all, it’s a matter of tastes, choices and personalities – so we need to deal with these!
Pouring your heart into the core of it
Now I am pretty sure about how you are staring at the screen, wondering what could be the core part of the father of the groom wedding speech. While some people say you can’t define any general core, you should find out that cores can be defined easily in many circumstances. In other words, it is generally the second part of your wedding speech that will have the core: talking about the groom. Yes, he is your precious son, even if you might have had misunderstandings or open conflicts.
The first thing you should respect, especially if your desire is to make sure that everything goes right is that your son’s wedding isn’t the time for that serious father son talk, during which you speak and your son listens. However, it is the perfect moment for you to show everyone – especially the newlyweds – that your son and his important decision really mean a lot for you.
Obviously, such things won’t happen if you are trying to achieve anything without practice. You will need to make sure to rehearse every part of your wedding speech, thus making sure that you correctly deal with every single aspect and part of it. Trust me about one thing: the success of any good speech stands in the text, which gives birth to the speech. Preparations aren’t always easy, because there is no single template or golden rule to follow. There are guidelines (which are going to be mentioned below), but you can always find better and newer solutions too.
So, one of the first things, especially during an important speech part as this is not to mumble and not to act like someone who is freaked out about not knowing the entire text without reading. I mean, honestly, who would ever appreciate your father of the groom speech if they knew you were reading every single word from a piece of paper? Then people would think for themselves and simply tell you: well, I could’ve done that too and then what makes you a better father?
To avoid criticism, out of reasons mentioned above or other, you need to be prepared to speak fluently and without mumbling, without having to take notes with you. Notes are for other purposes, they are basically meant to provide some aid while you are learning the speech and you are still changing parts of it. Sooner or later, every speech will reach a final form. When your speech reached that final form, all you have to do is keep rehearsing until you feel that you know the speech without the “script”.
However, a speech is never like a poem and never like a simple childhood story you have learned to recite. It is an intense living part of interaction, meant for you to connect with your guests (or better said your son’s guests). The first guideline to know how to speak is that you need to live your speech, while saying it. That means you are not reciting a simple poem and you are not reading a news magazine. It means a whole lot more: you have strong feelings, you have participated at many events you are referring to and many more. These things can easily be achieved if you have taken an active part in your son’s life, even after he met the bride, who should now be just as your new daughter. Still, in many families, these things have been missed, they probably never happened. If that is your story as well, then please find out that you have more things to hope for. First of all, you can still say a great speech and second of all out of empathy or a limited amount of experiences with your son you can express some parts whole-heartedly, even if most of the time you were missing.
But now some important questions need to be answered. How much are you supposed to talk about your son? What things you should say about him? Isn’t there also some obligation to talk about the bride? To shortly answer to these, you need to talk about him for 1 or 2 minutes, you should only say positive things and yes, there is quite a rule that you shouldn’t miss talking about the bride.
Other than these, prepare! Write notes, adjust them, edit them and consult other people for their opinion too. Sometimes, you might have elementary mistakes, which you might consider to be good speech parts, while they aren’t. These things can never be corrected alone, so you will definitely need some advices and indications, allowing you to identify these things and make sure you correct what you can. It is never a shame to ask for advice, but it is a big shame to realize you needed help when it is too late.
Talking about the bride must also follow
This is probably a more delicate part, because you have easily spoken about your son, but the bride is the other half of the big happy family picture. If you miss talking about her, you would take on the image of a careless, ignorant father, who is completely against women and who considers women are only meant to make children and food. These concepts are so wrong and fake! A woman will always be the perfect puzzle piece to complete any man’s life – no strong man can exist without a great, supporting wife.
Although these rules apply, you maybe had only a couple of moments to share with your daughter in law and then you can’t say too much about who the bride is or what she is like. Even if this is your story written in a simple sentence, you don’t need to feel discouraged and hopeless in editing a great father of the groom speech. You should always be aware of the fact that some meetings, some advices given by others can change this completely. The first person to help you in such matters is your son, or maybe even the bride. Obviously, these things are to be planned weeks or even better months before the actual wedding, unless you want to have a bad time crisis in which you will probably fail to meet all fatherly requirements you have for your son’s wedding.
If your son can’t help or if the bride is too busy, a lot of hope is still on the horizon. For example, you can ask some co-workers or other people who know her really well to hang out with you and talk about her best characteristics, her personality and generally things that are meant to show and to prove how great she is for your son.
Another really important part of this story is the moment you found out that your son is dating this gorgeous lady, who is now his wife. In some cases, this might have been like 5-6 years ago, or even like 15 years ago. Cases are various and colored, but all that matters is that these cases have brought happy endings for many people (and no, you don’t need to think about the negative examples constantly, thinking that if other couples failed your son will fail – that is not true).
Still, don’t be limited to the part in which you tell people that your daughter in law will truly make your son happy. This is not everything they want to hear in order to consider you as a respectful father. People will want to know you have accepted her in the family, they will want to find out that you agree with this relationship and that you support this young couple in their future decisions. If you are wondering, no, it is not an obligation. However, if you don’t do these things, you will only find yourself abandoned one day and you will find that your son and his bride are now completely strangers and they don’t even care about you. If that would happen in the future, it means you didn’t help when they needed you the most and you didn’t support them when their souls were crying for some help. Thus, knowing that these things might happen, you can avoid them by taking the right attitude in the present.
You can also share your wisest ideas, or some quotes
This is a great part of any father of the groom speech, especially if you know what you are doing. However, if you don’t pay attention, it can be one of the most boring parts, during which the only thought guests will have is to hear someone else speaking.
Now, it is a matter of personal tastes and decisions to decide whether you will go for giving some advices or you will choose to quote some famous writer. By quoting, I mean you can use poems, songs, movies and anything else you can imagine to be quoted. Obviously, what you quote will define your real message and if you go with the wrong message, then it’s really hard to make people believe that you have intended something better.
It is also advisable that you consult at least 5 people, who are great friends, about this part. This is necessary, because you need to know whether a listener would truly sense your message, or they might simply interpret other things (maybe things you never wanted to say and accidentally said them by quoting the wrong person). By following valuable advices, you will filter what you say during your wedding speech.
Also, while speaking, please remember that your son is not a teenager anymore. Also remember that you aren’t the best expert in the world as far as marriages go. So, your attitude will also make a huge difference in all of what you are saying.
Proposing the father of the groom speech toast
Writing the text for the father of the groom speech toast is also very important. However, it is not necessarily a part you should be doing alone. There are many books, websites and other places to reveal how a wedding speech toast should be formulated. Maybe those ideas won’t be to your liking, but it is important to read as much as you can.
It is also possible, especially if you feel the necessary amount of inspiration that you write your own toast. This is a risk, but if you are creative, it might turn out better than expected. Remember a few rules: keep it short, make sure people can appreciate it, make sure it honors the couple and make sure it won’t sound lame when people should raise their glasses to the couple of sentences you have just said!